To learn how to find a good nanny, start by defining what your family needs and what you can be flexible about. Write down the schedule, responsibilities, and experience you need, then begin your search early when possible while keeping your timeline realistic. [1][2] For more detail, see Nanny vs Daycare: How to Choose What Fits Your Family.
A clear starting point helps you focus on candidates whose availability and approach could work for your household. It can also keep the search manageable when you are balancing childcare decisions with a busy family schedule.
Make a practical wish list
Start with the days and hours you need covered, including any regular changes you already expect. For example, note whether care is needed on weekdays, whether pickup from school is part of the role, and whether you need someone who can stay later on a recurring day. Separate firm requirements from preferences so you know where you have room to adjust.
List the responsibilities you want the nanny to handle. You might need care focused on your child, or you may also want help with child-related tasks such as preparing a simple lunch or tidying play areas. Be specific about what matters in your home, rather than assuming a candidate will interpret a broad job description the same way you do. [2]
Decide what matters most
Choose a few priorities that would make a caregiver a strong match for your family. These might include experience with your child’s age, comfort with a particular routine, or a communication style that helps you feel informed. Treat other preferences—such as a specific hobby or an exact match in parenting style—as flexible if they are not essential to your child’s care.
This distinction gives you a useful way to weigh tradeoffs later. If a candidate meets your schedule and core care needs but does not share a less important preference, you can decide whether that difference matters in practice.
Set a realistic timeline
Begin looking early when you can, but keep your plans realistic. [1] Give yourself room to clarify the role and consider your options rather than waiting until your preferred start date is close. If your timeline is short, identify your nonnegotiables first and stay open to adjusting preferences that are not essential.
Where can you find nanny candidates?
You can find nanny candidates through people you trust, online caregiver platforms, social media, and nanny placement agencies. Asking in more than one place can give you different ways to compare candidates, while keeping your search focused on the care your family needs. [3]
Start with people you know
Ask friends and family whether they can recommend a nanny or connect you with someone who has relevant childcare experience. [3] A personal recommendation can help you identify someone to contact, but treat it as a starting point rather than a decision. You still need to learn whether the candidate’s experience and approach suit your family.
Make your request specific enough to get useful referrals. For example, you might tell a relative or friend that you are looking for someone with experience caring for toddlers, then ask if they know a person worth contacting. If no one has a recommendation, that does not mean you have run out of options.
Search online or through an agency
Online caregiver platforms and social media are other places to look for candidates, and you can also contact a nanny placement agency. [3] Online platforms let you search candidate profiles, while an agency can be another way to find a potential candidate. [1][4]
Choose the route that feels practical for your family, then use the same criteria when reviewing each person. For instance, if you find one candidate through a friend and another through a platform, compare their childcare experience and how closely each person matches your care needs—not the channel that led you to them. A referral is not automatically a better fit, and an online profile is not enough by itself to show that someone suits your family.
You can also ask people you know for referrals while exploring online options or agencies. [5] That gives you more than one way to identify candidates without assuming that a single route will work best. Keep notes on where you found each person if that helps you organize your search, but make your decision based on the candidate, not the source of the introduction.
As you gather names, focus on how each candidate’s relevant experience lines up with your stated needs. [4] A person who comes recommended may not have the experience you want, while a candidate you find online may be worth considering if their background matches. Use each route to build a pool of people to assess, then compare candidates on the same basis.
What should you prepare before interviewing?
Before you interview candidates, prepare a clear picture of your child’s care, the role’s day-to-day duties, and the qualities you hope to find. Being thorough and specific about your needs can help you explain the position clearly. [2]
Describe a typical day
Write down your child’s age and what a usual day looks like. Include details such as when they eat, nap, play, or go to activities, and note any routines you want a caregiver to follow. For example, if your toddler usually naps after lunch, explain what helps them settle and what you expect during that time.
Be clear about the work hours and duties you want to discuss. List the regular care tasks, such as preparing your child’s meals or tidying up toys, and separate them from anything you do not expect the nanny to handle. If you need care to begin before your workday or continue after it, describe those hours plainly so candidates can consider whether the role suits them.
Set your expectations
Think about the qualities and experience that matter most for your child. You might want someone who has cared for children around the same age, enjoys active play, or is comfortable following a predictable routine. Describe the experience you hope for in concrete terms rather than relying on broad labels such as “good with kids.”
Also note the household expectations you want to explain, including how you prefer to communicate about the day and what you consider a helpful update. For instance, you could tell candidates whether you want a brief message about meals and naps or a conversation at pickup. Clear examples make it easier to discuss expectations during the interview.
Prepare questions
Write questions that invite candidates to describe their caregiving experience and how they approach a child’s daily routine. You could ask what a typical day looked like in a previous role, how they handled naps or meals, and how they kept parents informed. Keep the questions connected to your child’s needs rather than using a generic list.
Plan a few questions about common care situations, too. For example, ask what a candidate might do if your child refuses a nap, has a tough drop-off, or becomes upset during play. You can also ask how they would let you know what happened. Preparing these questions ahead of time helps you use the interview to learn how each person communicates and thinks through everyday caregiving.
How to interview and assess a nanny
Explain the role, then listen. Briefly describe the work and invite the candidate to walk you through their childcare experience. Ask for a specific example: “Tell me about a time you cared for a child with a routine like this.” Listen for what they did, how they responded to the child, and what they learned. This makes the conversation more useful than a list of job titles alone.
Ask how they would handle everyday situations. Use a few realistic scenarios about routines, safety, and communication with you. For example: “If nap time is not going as planned, what would you try?” or “If your child gets a minor bump, how would you let us know?” Give the candidate room to explain their thinking rather than looking for a single perfect phrase. Keep the questions connected to the care your family needs.
Talk through expectations on both sides. Explain what you expect during the workday, and ask what the candidate needs to do the job well. You might discuss how you prefer updates, how handoffs should go, or what to do when a plan changes. Then pause and invite their questions; a candidate may want to clarify the role, household routines, or how you handle decisions about care.
Check references and verify experience before you decide. Contact the references the candidate provides and ask about their work together, the children’s care, and the candidate’s communication. Compare what you hear with the candidate’s examples, and follow up on anything that is unclear. Treat reference conversations as one part of your assessment, not a substitute for speaking directly with the candidate.
If practical, observe an interaction with your child. Arrange a brief, age-appropriate opportunity for the candidate to spend time with your child while you are present. Notice whether they pay attention to your child’s cues, speak warmly, and communicate with you about what they are doing. Your child may need time to warm up, so focus on the candidate’s attentiveness and approach rather than expecting an instant connection. Use what you observe alongside the interview and reference conversations when making your decision.
How to decide whether a nanny is a good fit
A good nanny fit is supported by consistent information, respectful communication, and a caregiving approach that suits your child and family. Rather than relying on a single strong interview or a warm first impression, look for a pattern across what the candidate tells you, what references share, and how expectations are discussed.
Look for consistency
Compare the candidate’s description of their experience with the examples they give and what their references confirm. For instance, if they say they have cared for toddlers, ask yourself whether their examples address the kinds of routines and challenges your child is likely to have. You are looking for a coherent picture, not a perfect answer to every question.
Pay attention to gaps or differences that need clarification. If a reference describes duties that sound different from the candidate’s account, ask a calm, direct follow-up before deciding. A reasonable explanation may resolve the difference; an unanswered question is a reason to pause and gather more information.
Notice how communication feels
A good working relationship needs respectful, clear communication on both sides. Notice whether the candidate listens to your concerns, answers plainly, and feels comfortable asking you questions too. You should be able to discuss a misunderstanding or a change in the day without feeling dismissed.
Check that you share a clear understanding of the practical expectations. For example, if you expect updates during the day, agree on what those updates should cover and how you will communicate. If either side seems to be assuming something different, talk it through before making a commitment.
Weigh fit against your family’s needs
Use your child’s needs and your family’s priorities to weigh tradeoffs instead of searching for a candidate who is ideal in every way. A candidate may have especially relevant experience but a communication style that does not work for your household; another may communicate well but need support with a less familiar routine. Consider which differences you can work with and which would make daily care harder.
Avoid deciding on instinct alone. Gather the information you still need, clarify open questions, and take time to compare the full picture before committing. A reassuring first impression can matter, but it should sit alongside consistent details and clear expectations.
Choose with clarity and care
Keep the decision grounded in the role your family needs, what you learn in interviews, and what references confirm. Finding a good nanny is not about choosing the candidate with the smoothest interview; it is about checking whether their experience and approach fit your family’s day-to-day care. [2]
Before you decide, make sure you can describe the job clearly and compare candidates against the same needs. Look in several appropriate places, then use specific questions to understand how each person handles the work. [1][2][3] For example, if your child’s afternoon includes a nap, a snack, and outdoor play, ask candidates how they would approach that routine and what they would communicate to you. Your questions should help you picture the actual care your child would receive, not just produce reassuring general answers.
After interviews, check references and compare what you hear with each candidate’s experience and approach. [2] A reference conversation can help you understand how a candidate worked with a family; listen for details that connect to your own expectations, such as how they communicated or handled the care responsibilities you discussed. If an answer or reference leaves you unsure, pause and ask a clear follow-up rather than filling in the gap with a guess.
Your next step is to review your notes, confirm references, and choose the person whose experience and caregiving approach best fit your family. [2] You do not need to find a candidate who matches every preference; focus on a clear, well-supported fit for the role you have defined.